I feel like I am lying face down on the floor. I don’t want to get up either. I just want to lay here and sulk a while, until I figure out why I carry a terrible curse in my head. I don’t think I have ever felt human a day in my life, in fact I used to tell my mom I wasn’t from here. Of course what sounded strange at time is no longer feeling strange. I am deeply upset about what I am. I feel like I am so saddened by the fact I wasn’t a breakaway singer running from the hills to become what I have always dreamed of becoming-a singer. I don’t want all the popularity. I just want to live up to what my namesake has always been. I am confused. How come someone you love so much can just simply not spell it all out for me? Lord,you work on your own time,but I am asking abd begging what does it all mean? I feel like a take the weight of the world on my shoulders. I almost collapse with a rush of good and evil that flows though me at any time. Please allow me to understand this. It is all I ask. I love you Lord, and I am thankful for what I have but please don’t forget about me.